Grown Talk: Should Black Men show each other more respect/brotherhood?
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The short answer is yes. However, not every brother deserves such kindness.
My cousin is a good dude. After our older cousin passed away last November, he took over caring for the elder people in the family. He has the kindness and patience to do such things that I just do not. One could say he's too nice.
He got married this past Saturday, and at the wedding reception I had an idea. We had talked in the past and he said he wanted a smoker. Amazon happened to have one on sale and I looked at the price and concocted a plan. I asked 13 people for $20 via cash app and was able to secure enough money to buy him this smoker.
I ordered it on Amazon and had it delivered to his home. I sent the list of everyone who had contributed to his wife and when he arrived home Monday afternoon he was surprised to tears.
My blood brother is a 45-year-old man who still lives at home with our mother. All he does is smoke. He's got a good job that doesn't drug test, but he ain't no good. I've said in the past that he wrote me a 28-page fuck you letter that I didn't finish reading, because who reads a 28 page fuck you letter. I didn't finish the first page.
I said all that to show that not every brother deserves brotherhood treatment. The sooner you recognize that the better so you don't waste time and financial resources on people who are unworthy
My cousin is a good dude. After our older cousin passed away last November, he took over caring for the elder people in the family. He has the kindness and patience to do such things that I just do not. One could say he's too nice.
He got married this past Saturday, and at the wedding reception I had an idea. We had talked in the past and he said he wanted a smoker. Amazon happened to have one on sale and I looked at the price and concocted a plan. I asked 13 people for $20 via cash app and was able to secure enough money to buy him this smoker.
I ordered it on Amazon and had it delivered to his home. I sent the list of everyone who had contributed to his wife and when he arrived home Monday afternoon he was surprised to tears.
My blood brother is a 45-year-old man who still lives at home with our mother. All he does is smoke. He's got a good job that doesn't drug test, but he ain't no good. I've said in the past that he wrote me a 28-page fuck you letter that I didn't finish reading, because who reads a 28 page fuck you letter. I didn't finish the first page.
I said all that to show that not every brother deserves brotherhood treatment. The sooner you recognize that the better so you don't waste time and financial resources on people who are unworthy
Understood
But why is TOO NICE?
he is doing something you admit you couldn't do.
And you were able to get 20 other people who obviously redoect him to chip.on the gift.
Seems he is just a good person period.
And inspiring
We need more of him in the world so he insist seen as "too nice" but just normal.
I say too nice, because there is such a thing. We have a cousin who is in constant recovery from his crack addiction. One day he was over Donnie's house and he needed to catch the bus home because no one was available to take him and asked Donnie for $2.50 so he can get an all-day pass to catch the bus.
Donnie was about to give him $20 and his fiance and his fiance intercepted him and said, "Do not give him $20". Not because she was being mean, but because she knew that he would have went straight to the dope man and smoked up that money.
Donnie was thinking maybe he could have got some food or something, but you don't give an addict that much money. You give them exactly the amount of money they need.
Donnie is too giving to his detriment, because He has a lot of stuff to pay for in his own life and his own house, but tries to help out everyone, including paying for that same cousin's tux for Donnie's own wedding and paying for the round trip plane tickets for his sister and brother from California for that same wedding
I know yall family but I hope his fiance is really the one and looks out for him over the long term because she could easily flip the script and take advantage of him. Take it from "personal experience"
Nah, she's one of the good ones trust me. They have bills of their own to pay, Including paying for a car repair.I know yall family but I hope his fiance is really the one and looks out for him over the long term because she could easily flip the script and take advantage of him. Take it from "personal experience"
I'm not trying to suggest that you don't help anyone out, but there has to be measured assistance and you can't overlook your own needs to help someone else...well, at least not too much. Believe me, he tries to do too much. If it were me, I would have had my sister and brother flip a coin on who comes and the other one live stream the wedding, not paid for both of them, but that's me.
Good insight on navigating the later stages and life changes
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We need to see more of this
Black men smiling and showing love and respect and emotion
Nothing makes people angrier
Putting this into the brotherhood thread, but the larger issue here is that how we treat our children (specifically our sons) will stay with them their entire life. Yes this world is tough but we our kids should never question if you love them or not. Show them love and verbally tell them you love them...