"Not Mine" A Short Story By "PsiBorg"

[Ass Assassin]

Nice work folks!!!

 

[PsiBorg]

Nice work folks!!!

Thank you, Brother...

 

[Temujin]

Good story. My only note is more sensory details. Everything is from the visual perspective add some sounds, smells, feelings, sensations. It will bring the reader more into the scene.

 

[Cochese2k]

Good stuff bro, I feel like there's a little plot hole with the cuff link. Would have liked a little more background there but I left it to the imagination as she was f****** around.

 

[PsiBorg]

Good story. My only note is more sensory details. Everything is from the visual perspective add some sounds, smells, feelings, sensations. It will bring the reader more into the scene.

Thank you, Bro.

I can agree with what you're saying. It's a very short story at this point. But, if I decide to stretch it out a bit, I most surely will add the elements that you're speaking about.

Good catch though.

 

[PsiBorg]

Good stuff bro, I feel like there's a little plot hole with the cuff link. Would have liked a little more background there but I left it to the imagination as she was f****** around.

When she had sex with Curt the day before, neither one of them noticed that he dropped one of his cufflinks.

Curt is so arrogant that of course later he knew that he didn't have it. But, he didn't give a damn about where he lost it. He'd just buy another pair.

The foul thing was, he could have asked Gina, "Did I leave one of my cufflinks there? Or, "Hey, I lost a cufflink. It's probably in your bedroom, you should look so O'le Boy doesn't find it."

But, he only cares about himself. There's more to the story that would have explained Curt's behaviors... but let's just say that Curt is asshole number one. He only cares about himself and no one else. So he'd leave it up to Gina to find it. If she did, great. If she didn't, great. If Matt found it, great. He doesn't care!

 

[Cochese2k]

Interesting, I assumed the vanity was in the bathroom... Keep'em coming.

 

[dik cashmere]

Dope

 

[2Klub]

Just read this again. Loved it. We need an angle with Gina calling into a Kevin Samuels (RIP NUPE) type of character.