Great thread!!!
I do all of those things with wifey. I have an average-sized dick but it seems like size isn't the major factor with you women. Thank God for the tongue! Hah hah. But it's not just that. I usually warm her up with doing nice things for her during the day, and giving her compliments, then I massage her and continuously kiss her back and whisper sexy things to her with my deep voice.
Then it's stage two. I gently and SLOWLY kiss around her pussy and work my way up to the clit. I usually wait for around 15 to 20 minutes before I get to the clit. And it really turns her on when I whisper "Here kitty, kitty". It drives her crazy.
I'm a pussy worshiper and I let her know it. She gets so hot when I eat her out that her clit swells twice her normal size. After that I tend to kiss it more and gently rub it around my face.
Then it's hammer time. I go for the jugular by focusing only on the clit with gentle pulsations of my tongue and lips and when I feel the pulsations of her pussy getting stronger it really turns me on that I'm giving her all this pleasure! She explodes with ecstasy and screams really loud. Then it's dick time. I guess you know the rest.
Fellas, I tell you it's about pleasing her mind body and soul!
Peace.