BGOL Dilemma: The Proposal

[playahaitian]

I can't see menfolx saying no to this. They already get along and they don't seem especially needy. Anyway... @playhaitian when do we get the true story?

you would be surprised.

Its one thing to say you could but to actually be faced with the reality.

To be given that responsibility and that amount of trust and respect?

How many men do you know who have been in a position like that and totally ruined it?

Usually AFTER specifically ASKING for it?

I had stopped doing these threads cause I was getting hate...then I got PMs asking why I stopped. I actually started using them for a script and the Big Homie Bills has got me researching some things...

So I got to hold off for a second...a taste.

It was after college 2 beautiful young Black women I met while volunteering at a non-profit. And they both had a really tough life...abuse, homelessness.

And through sheer strength of will they made a success of themselves.
They really took a liking to me and were really into Pan-African-ism and Harlem Renaissance and Hip hop and art and the Black family. Introduced me to a lot new things. And then...

well the dilemma was based on them and always consider what I should have done differently.

 

[Camille]

I had stopped doing these threads cause I was getting hate...then I got PMs asking why I stopped. I actually started using them for a script and the Big Homie Bills has got me researching some things...

So I got to hold off for a second...a taste.

It was after college 2 beautiful young Black women I met while volunteering at a non-profit. And they both had a really tough life...abuse, homelessness.

And through sheer strength of will they made a success of themselves.
They really took a liking to me and were really into Pan-African-ism and Harlem Renaissance and Hip hop and art and the Black family. Introduced me to a lot new things. And then...

well the dilemma was based on them and always consider what I should have done differently.

Tease. SMH...ole Scheherazade azz drawing stuff out over 1001 nights....

 

[playahaitian]

Tease. SMH...ole Scheherazade azz drawing stuff out over 1001 nights....

we just become best bgol friends

 

[largebillsonlyplease]

I'm looking for a 2nd wife right now

 

[playahaitian]

I can't see menfolx saying no to this. They already get along and they don't seem especially needy. Anyway... @playhaitian when do we get the true story?

So as hard as it to believe this kind of happened to me on TWO separate occasions.
One time it was my first REAL job after college.
I was working with non profits and at risk kids etc. And 2 young women (beautiful black women who looked like the woman in the pic and I mean beautiful but they grew up fast and were REAL street smart and smoked cigarettes etc hood but SMART black ladies) on staff who were actually a year or two older all became cool. Actually that isn't true the didn't REALLY like each other but they both liked me. And over time we all become lunch buddies. And they each had a kid and HORRIBLE relationships with their baby fathers. And I guess me being young tall black working educated religious etc...I wasn't what they were used too, especially since I wasn't a square...and I would take them home occasionally and they lived in the projects or real hood spots and I never had any issues. Over time they each individually tried to holla at me, and since we worked together I never entertained it. But I would buy stuff for their kids take them to museums buy them books and any hook ups I got I work like scholarships, grants etc I would make sure to take care them...So at this point they actually seemed MAD I didn't sleep with them. So there would be days they didn't talk to me etc...
I would ignore it, but when I found them both 2 bedroom rent controlled apts through the foundation? That was it.
So it was after work they invited me to dinner their treat, I was a little surprised cause it was MY favorite restaurant. And during dinner they actually made some gay joke and I was like WTF? They said you either gay or plotting a 3 way, and we aint gay. So I was like what is this all about? They had decided that they both wanted to be in a relationship with me at the same time. I had no idea how to react. They laid out this damn game plan and said I was good with their respective kids I was a good man they didn't need any money but together could pay for my graduate school and they enjoyed me and were done with broke dudes...I just needed to respect them and the relationship and I would be the man and the leader of this "family".
I couldn't do it. My OG was like you aint built for all that and that is a whole of responsibility especially with kids involved.
But I stayed very cool with them for years...and they DID try more than once to convince me to do it.

 

[playahaitian]

Tease. SMH...ole Scheherazade azz drawing stuff out over 1001 nights....

Oh and they both went on to be HUGE successes and thanked me for helping and believing in them.

 

[Camille]

I'm looking for a 2nd wife right now

Interesting...

 

[largebillsonlyplease]

Interesting...

you applying?
i gotta find my 1st one too though

 

[Majestic Lion]

Zero issues found with this scenario.

 

[Camille]

you applying?
i gotta find my 1st one too though

Not at this time. You are under consideration tho to become the official boy toy of SOL. Once the nominations are complete and the votes are cast, if you take the top spot, I'll put my reservation in.

 

[playahaitian]

Not at this time. You are under consideration tho to become the official boy toy of SOL. Once the nominations are complete and the votes are cast, if you take the top spot, I'll put my reservation in.

hey I demand not only a recount but a specific breakdown of the nomination and criteria rules

 

[playahaitian]

Interesting...

did you watch Big Love?

Would you watch a series about this exact scenario?

 

[playahaitian]

Zero issues found with this scenario.

it aint as easy as it seems fam.

 

[largebillsonlyplease]

Not at this time. You are under consideration tho to become the official boy toy of SOL. Once the nominations are complete and the votes are cast, if you take the top spot, I'll put my reservation in.

i have no doubt ill win. id like to credit what i can "putin" each and every one of you as the deciding factor

 

[Camille]

hey I demand not only a recount but a specific breakdown of the nomination and criteria rules

Sorry babe, that is classified SOL business, and you, unfortunately are married so you are ineligible to be nominated. You have to available days at a time for the SOL dungeon, and with a wife and kids, you don't have the freedom to do this.

 

[Camille]

did you watch Big Love?

Would you watch a series about this exact scenario?

No, I've never seen that show.

 

[Camille]

i have no doubt ill win. id like to credit what i can "putin" each and every one of you as the deciding factor

You are a strong contender, no doubt.

 

[playahaitian]

No, I've never seen that show.

Its about a white Mormon in Utah who secretly has 3 wives.

I had an idea for a show about a Black man being approached by 2 Black women who propose a similar arrangement...

it would tackle Black feminism, white feminism modern masculinity Black men black women black family black love identity African roots sexuality

 

[playahaitian]

You are a strong contender, no doubt.

 

[largebillsonlyplease]

You are a strong contender, no doubt.

"BLACK POWER"

 

[Camille]

"BLACK POWER"

lmaooooooooooooo

 

[Texas Catdaddy]

if i was a single dude, we'd be 20 yrs in w/4 grown kids.....

 

[playahaitian]

if i was a single dude, we'd be 20 yrs in w/4 grown kids.....

hold on you bringing these 2 women to your mama house for Thanksgiving?

 

[Camille]

Its about a white Mormon in Utah who secretly has 3 wives.

I had an idea for a show about a Black man being approached by 2 Black women who propose a similar arrangement...

it would tackle Black feminism, white feminism modern masculinity Black men black women black family black love identity African roots sexuality

Why does a Mormon in Utah have to hide his wives?

I don't know. I guess it depends on whether or not it's well done. There are actually few shows that I watch anymore.

 

[playahaitian]

Why does a Mormon in Utah have to hide his wives?

I don't know. I guess it depends on whether or not it's well done. There are actually few shows that I watch anymore.

Cause polygamy is illegal...but its accepted by devout Mormons.

So what DO you watch...what 5 shows are really WATCHING right now?

 

[Camille]

Cause polygamy is illegal...but its accepted by devout Mormons.

So what DO you watch...what 5 shows are really WATCHING right now?

Nothing really. All the shows I normally watch are on break. The Librarians are back, but I haven't watched this season yet, just bits and pieces. During the day the TV is usually on TNT for reruns or MSNBC. I'm considering watching Westworld, I caught the end of that, but I just cancelled my HBO last week, so we'll see.

 

[playahaitian]

Nothing really. All the shows I normally watch are on break. The Librarians are back, but I haven't watched this season yet, just bits and pieces. During the day the TV is usually on TNT for reruns or MSNBC. I'm considering watching Westworld, I caught the end of that, but I just cancelled my HBO last week, so we'll see.

I actually saw a Librarians marathon and it wasn't bad...

reminded me a little of the days of Xena and Hercules meets Indiana Jones.

 

[Majestic Lion]

it aint as easy as it seems fam.

Very little that's worth having is ever easy. What's the hard part you're seeing with this situation?

 

[Texas Catdaddy]

hold on you bringing these 2 women to your mama house for Thanksgiving?

sure, mom was 1 of my confidants besides she knew i played outside the norm.....

 

[Texas Catdaddy]

Very little that's worth having is ever easy. What's the hard part you're seeing with this situation?

this.....

 

[playahaitian]

Very little that's worth having is ever easy. What's the hard part you're seeing with this situation?

this.....

If your not the type to be juggling 2 women

and in this case being in a COMMITTED relationship with 2 strong woman...married in a sense

and being the leader in every sense of the word

financially sexually spiritually and physically?

that is a lot of responsibility and energy.

I think its much EASIER said then done.

this isn't some pseudo pimp sh*t either, this is family building

and judging by so many single households and divorce rates with just 2 people

I would imagine adding an ADDITIONAL person aint gonna make it EASIER.

 

[Texas Catdaddy]

If your not the type to be juggling 2 women

and in this case being in a COMMITTED relationship with 2 strong woman...married in a sense

and being the leader in every sense of the word

financially sexually spiritually and physically?

that is a lot of responsibility and energy.

I think its much EASIER said then done.

this isn't some pseudo pimp sh*t either, this is family building

and judging by so many single households and divorce rates with just 2 people

I would imagine adding an ADDITIONAL person aint gonna make it EASIER.

your not actually juggling 2 because everyone's on the same page, and some cats saying yes because they thinking of the pimp aspect, but i don't see this being anymore complicated than sharing your life with one woman who occasionally shows you the other side of her, you just roll with it playa.....

 

[Majestic Lion]

If your not the type to be juggling 2 women

and in this case being in a COMMITTED relationship with 2 strong woman...married in a sense

and being the leader in every sense of the word

financially sexually spiritually and physically?

that is a lot of responsibility and energy.

I think its much EASIER said then done.

this isn't some pseudo pimp sh*t either, this is family building

and judging by so many single households and divorce rates with just 2 people

I would imagine adding an ADDITIONAL person aint gonna make it EASIER.

They were already on even keel with each other AND you during the friendship phase. There's no "juggling".

I can tell you've never actually seen this work before because for any females to go that route they'd have to be solid with themselves first before you ever entered the picture. In that kind of situation there's less chance of wrangling for attention and whatever, they'd more than likely handle the scheduling - for lack of a better term - between/amongst themselves in order to take the stress of it off your shoulders.

Less stress = more energy for the leadership you mentioned


All parties have to work at it like anything else, sure...but if everybody's working toward maintaining that harmony then you're all set. There's no space for immaturity in this setup, the females aren't children. Sometimes you might have to step in to arbitrate...most times they'd hash whatever out themselves according to the principles you lay down and everybody just keeps moving forward.


What is it that you're envisioning being the major problem in being "the leader in every sense of the word"? Money?

 

[playahaitian]

They were already on even keel with each other AND you during the friendship phase. There's no "juggling".

I can tell you've never actually seen this work before because for any females to go that route they'd have to be solid with themselves first before you ever entered the picture. In that kind of situation there's less chance of wrangling for attention and whatever, they'd more than likely handle the scheduling - for lack of a better term - between/amongst themselves in order to take the stress of it off your shoulders.

Less stress = more energy for the leadership you mentioned


All parties have to work at it like anything else, sure...but if everybody's working toward maintaining that harmony then you're all set. There's no space for immaturity in this setup, the females aren't children. Sometimes you might have to step in to arbitrate...most times they'd hash whatever out themselves according to the principles you lay down and everybody just keeps moving forward.


What is it that you're envisioning being the major problem in being "the leader in every sense of the word"? Money?

Like you said it's just to good to be true, I think if raised since birth with this dynamic ? yeah possibly bit the modern black family? it's just seems fraught with hurdle amd pitfalls that make this damn near impossible to pull off...

And fam,

No matter WHAT the question is ?

The answer is ALWAYS money.

 

[Mixd]

I have strong reservations about vegan ice cream. Everything else with this situation is kosher to me.