How black people can emotionally protect themselves in the age of #BlackLivesMatter

[Camille]

I often have to take a break from social media. Last year there was a time period where a week didn't go buy where someone unarmed wasn't getting shot or killed.


https://www.washingtonpost.com/blog...ct-themselves-in-the-age-of-blacklivesmatter/

“All of these police brutality videos on my feed are making me sick,” a black male friend of mine from college posted on Facebook recently, after Sandra Bland’s disturbing encounter with officer Brian Encinia in Waller, Tex., was caught on camera. Three days later, Bland was dead. It made many of us sick.

Yet again, we have video of excessive police force being exacted on an unarmed black person.

We watch the footage because in America, for black people to have any hope that we might gain justice in the event of police brutality, we need to have video evidence of the violence. But within that hope for justice that a released video brings lies a poisonous pill buried inside that we are forced to consume — that pill of audible or visual black suffering. From Eric Garner in New York, to 15-year-old Dajerria Becton in McKinney, Tex., to now Sandra Bland, we absorb in our souls the cries of a black person in pain at the hands of white officer, the fact that heads are being smashed, that airways are being choked and that ribs are being broken. Sometimes, that poisonous pill of black pain comes with an extra barb embedded inside for good measure — when we hear white officers respond to black pain with malicious indifference. In the case of Eric Harris’s death, an officer responded with “F— your breath.” In the video, Sandra Bland screamed, “I have epilepsy!” Encinia responded, “Good, good.”

(Bigstock)
While cellphones, social media and the #BlackLivesMatter movement have certainly helped to raise national awareness of racism and police brutality, it can literally hurt to watch these violent encounters. Even further, when we go online, not only are we surrounded with footage of police violence and related commentary, but also we are exposed to the emotional pain of our friends, family and allies expressing grief, anxiety, anger and fear on our social media feeds. Of course, there are plenty of white and non-black people of color who are shocked, angered and disgusted by such incidents. But for many black people, it can feel isolating when non-black friends seem to remain silent on these issues too.

It can all be too much. This great video by @eveeeeezy for For Harriet explains why one would want to “call in black”:



Writer Luvvie Ajayi chimed in on the notion of self-care after Sandra Bland:



Hey you. You who has been reading every detail. You who had the courage to watch the dashcam video. You who have been feeling yourself fall into depths of despair. Tonight, tomorrow, this week. Do something to take care of yourself. Even if it means unplugging. Even if it means not reading one more thing. Even if it means you are out of the loop. Find videos of laughing babies. Drop the load for a few days and let others pick it up.

It’s time for a reminder about self-care in the age of #BlackLivesMatter. In an interview with the New York Times Magazine, psychologist Monnica Williams explains that there is such a thing as race-based trauma and stress, and that these conditions can be triggered by events in the news or on social media. She also speaks of vicarious trauma, where something that happens to one person miles away can affect us. Williams says that symptoms of trauma can be depression, an inability to sleep, apathy and avoidance.

In light of that, here are some self-care tips for black people who are starting to feel overwhelmed by the racism and violence in their digital feeds:

It’s okay not to watch the latest video of brutality against people of color. Just because you choose not to watch doesn’t mean you are ignoring what’s going on. It’s okay to turn off the news. It just means you know what you can and can’t emotionally handle. Removing yourself from a potential cause of trauma is just taking care of yourself by setting boundaries, and that’s healthy.

In fact, you can take a break from trying to educate everyone about race and racism and from engaging with racist trolls online. It’s perfectly fine to feel like you don’t want to explain *again* what white privilege is, why it’s dismissive and dehumanizing to respond to black people grieving over the latest racist incident with, “But #AllLivesMatter!” You can take a break from trying to explain the double standards in how whites and blacks are treated by police. Doing the emotional work of explaining your humanity and why you deserve to have equal rights is tiring. You don’t have to engage with the trolls on Twitter prowling around, looking to antagonize people who tweet about the latest #JusticeFor_____ hashtag. Block and mute away, my friend.

Get away from the computer altogether and get back into nature. Get outside, if you can. Get some sun. Walk in a park. If you live near the sea, a lake, a river or even just a creek, take a stroll by the water. Studies have shown the mental health benefits of just being around trees. Even if it means bringing flowers or plants home, that can help too. Nature is also a reminder that there is beauty in this world, and that we all equally deserve to share in it, no matter what race, skin color or ethnicity you have.

Create something. Produce beauty from the ashes. I’m not saying one needs to draw pictures of rainbows and unicorns in response to white supremacy, racism and violence. But if you like to write, write to express your feelings. If you like to paint, paint. If drawing is your thing, draw. If you like to make music, take to an instrument and play. If making wooden birdhouses helps you get your feelings out, then do it. When the world seems like it’s hell-bent on the destruction of black people — get out there and expend your creative energy.

It is okay to feel sad. It is okay to be angry. It is okay to cry. Don’t discount how you feel just because you saw something that triggered you on Instagram, Facebook or Twitter. No, you don’t have to “get over” racism or being impacted by racist violence. No one expected America to “just get over” 9/11, or for families to “just get over” Columbine, or Sandy Hook. Many people saw themselves in Sandra Bland. It’s terrifying to think what happened to her could have happened to any black person.

Watch funny movies or comedy skits. Find a way to laugh, however you can. Mirthful laughter is also a powerful stress reliever and can help with muscle relaxation. So go ahead, fire up the latest Netflix marathon of your favorite comedian.

Human touch reduces stress and anxiety. Find that friend, partner or family member you can hug. Offer hugs, and let yourself receive them too. Seriously, people who receive more hugs are more likely to ward off stress-induced sickness.

Physical and spiritual activity. Again, this is about expending energy. Go for a run, do yoga. Team sports are a great idea. Whatever it is, find healthy, safe ways to physically express your feelings. Mindful breathing can also help. On the spiritual side, if it’s your thing, pray or meditate.

Sleep well and eat well. Stress and anxiety can cause changes in appetite and sleeping habits. And eating and sleeping poorly can depress your immune system and lead to sickness.

Reach out for help if you need it. Surround yourself with support. Talk to your friends. Talk to family members. Talk to pastors, clergymen, anyone you think will lend an understanding, sympathetic ear about how you feel. On the flip side, reach out to others you think might be struggling. They may appreciate it more than you know. If you need to, talk with a professional counselor who understands the impacts of racism on mental health.

The fight for equality and justice will be long. In the age of #BlackLivesMatter, also remember that your emotional health matters too.

 

[Camille]

http://www.thefader.com/2016/07/06/randi-gloss-black-self-care

The creator of the social awareness brand GLOSSRAGS shares some ways to remain well despite the devastation of police killings in the black community.





On Tuesday in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, 37 year-old, father of five, Alton Sterling was shot and killed by police officers in front of a convenience store. After harrowing video footage of the shooting was released to the public, the atmosphere on social media became instantly despairing.

Black Lives Matter activist and creator of the socially charged brand GLOSSRAGS, Randi Gloss has been on the front lines as an advocate for justice against police violence against the black community since 2012 and she's coped with quite a lot of loss. Her brand's most coveted item is a shirt that lists the names of victims of U.S. police violence. Over the past year, the 25 year-old change maker has continued to add more names to the shirt as more black people have been killed by police officers across the nation.

Gloss spoke to The FADER on Wednesday morning over the phone from Washington D.C. She explained how to honor wellness in mourning and ways that black people can indulge in self-care through times of black trauma and death.






RANDI GLOSS: I think in some ways it feels like we’re on a sinking ship and that many of us feel like we’re drowning in this sorrow or in so many ways being water boarded. Like our black skin is holding us hostage and America is constantly washing us, suffocating us and throwing buckets of trauma down our throats over and over again to the point where we’re gasping for air. We’re trying to come to the surface. It feels like we’re drowning in our own blood because every time we turn around it’s somebody new. I was just saying how this summer has been relatively quiet and this year has been quiet compared to last year. I think by May of last year, I had added another four or five names [to the shirts] because there were so many people. This year has been a lot different but it was only a matter of time.

I had to put my head down this morning. I got up early to do my dishes and I had to meditate on Chance The Rapper’s “How Great.” I had it on repeat and I had put both my hands on the sink and put my head down and I was like, “Wow, I might have to add a name.”

I was talking to Netta this morning and I was saying how engaging with Alton Sterling’s death is like looking into water, taking a deep breath, diving deep and taking the plunge again.

I have the picture in my head of Harry Potter when he had to go into that water and all the skeletons are trying to pull him under with Dumbledore. I was on the sideline. I was on the shore. Like, “Alright I can breathe.”

I can’t sit this one out because there have been names that I haven’t been engaging. I haven’t been engrossing myself in that trauma because I’m still trying to recover from so many others. That’s not apathy but in some ways that can be a means of self-care. It’s not clicking on every single name that’s been hashtagged because that really can drag you down. This death really brought me back into the fold again because it’s just so blatant.



What social media does so well, especially Twitter and Instagram, is it gives us the platform to just express ourselves, our feelings, our sadness. I would encourage people to keep speaking out about that. Get together and have conversations in person. Having the physical presence of someone next to you kind of serves to fill that void. It’s weird thinking about how you fill the void for the loss of somebody that you’ve never even met. That’s a really challenging question and phenomena or an epidemic even because it keeps happening.

Today is July 6th—we’re just about a week away from [the one year anniversary of] Sandra Bland’s murder. Then we have [the two year anniversary of] Eric Garner and Mike Brown. So, what’s left of the summer will also be a lot of mourning. It’s something to be cognizant of because for me, it will dictate my mood, it will drain some of my energy. Gathering together in spaces where we can have conversations or even spaces where we can laugh because we still have to celebrate the black boys and the black girls and the black fathers and mothers who are still alive. We have to celebrate that there is black life on this earth. Maybe it’s not something that is completely free to be, but there still is black life worth celebrating and that’s something we have to remind ourselves of.

If we’re always focusing on the loss or we lose ourselves in the loss, in the mourning and the trauma, we’ll forget that we have lives that are still very much worth living and that there is some joy in being black and alive in 2016.

 

[Camille]

http://www.respectyourstruggle.com/2016/03/10-daily-positive-affirmations-for.html

10 Daily Positive Affirmations For Black Lives When They Forget That They Matter



Every morning when I rise I make it a duty to be aware of where I am in space and time and to emit a spirit of gratitude and graciousness back towards the universe. I believe rising with a sense of mindfulness helps to alleviate the calm, but also helps with putting on my shield of armor for the battles that the average human being has to face in this world.

Whether it be through scripture reading, meditation, daily devotionals or a calming song- I make it an obligation to keep peace orbiting around me as I prepare for whatever storms, obstacles, or trials that may await me on my journey.

As a black woman, I feel as if I have to be more in tune with my humanness- I can’t just focus on my soul, but the body that houses it and the flesh that gives it substance. With the constant degradation of black bodies, the continuous stream of micro-aggressions, and the same song being sung declaring we shall overcome- yet sometimes it feels like we haven’t gotten there yet, can take a toll on the human psyche and how one perceives oneself and dwells within this world.

The energies that orbit around us- bad or good, can weigh heavy on a persons spirit and when they are compartmentalized, rather than warded off, they can become an emotional burden and a soul-sucking force. Replenishing yourself is necessary for practicing the art of compassion and cultivating a deeper sense of love towards yourself. In a world that may try to oppress, marginalize, devalue or strip you of your worth- it is your duty to keep your foundations solid and heed not to the falsehoods that try to redefine your truths.
Practicing meditation and speaking positive affirmations over your life are useful tools that can better your perception of self and better your self-esteem. The power behind these two practices is the tongue- that is your weapon of warfare. What you speak into the atmosphere, shall become one with the atmosphere, and I believe rising up in the morning and declaring your truths are a great way to keep you balanced and will attribute to how you set the tone for the rest of your day.

Here are 10 positive affirmations [or meditations] every young black soul needs to remember:

1. I am enough- I will not conform or lesser my standards to appease or appeal to anyone who does not accept me for who I am and what I am.
2. I am worthy- the color of my skin is not definitive of where I belong in this world and no one will be allowed to disregard my presence, or silence my voice, based on the color of my flesh.
3. I will surround myself with positive people- if there is anyone in my life that tries to disturb or threaten my peace, I will compassionately remove him or her from my space and focus on the souls whom I share a genuine connection with.
4. I am allowed to acknowledge all that makes me human- I give myself permission to weep and to experience sorrow, to laugh or to cry, to make mistakes or feel failure, to grieve and to praise, and I will recognize my humanness and be submerged in all its glory.
5. My body is celestial- my temple is an exhibit of Gods art form. His hands have crafted me with goodness in mind and intricate detail. I exhibit a touch of warmth- the sun has kissed my flesh and I am the Polaris in a bed full of stars whom covet my light- My being will be respected, I refuse to be another tossed black body.
6. I will allow myself to evolve- I will trust my process and applaud myself for my progress. I am trying- and I will recognize that that is enough.
7. I will recognize my good qualities- I am an imperfect person but I am full of grace, wisdom, beauty and knowledge. I will not let my insecurities ring louder than my worth.
8. I am deserving of respect- I practice kindness, I cultivate love towards others and I have a right to expect that same energy to be emitted back to me. Being treated like a human is not too much to ask for- therefore, I will make my petition known unapologetically.
9. I will not conform to the ways of my enemies- I will uphold my virtues and I will not stoop down to the negative actions or opinions from folks who do not walk in my light.
10. I will love myself unconditionally- the love that I cultivate towards myself will be the calm within my storms. My life is deserving of its best chance, and I will walk on the path that promotes inner healing. I will stay grounded and rooted in the fruit of internal love, and I will not be swayed to believe less of myself or what I am capable of becoming.

Find your inner voice and speak nourishment into your life. Take control of your unconscious mind and find your calm. Reconnect with the parts of you that have gotten lost in the whirlwind of life, focus on your breaths and begin the process of drowning out the noise around you as focus on the voice that rings within.

 

[Dr. Truth]

Can I get some cliff notes.

 

[Mr. Bizkits]

As a fellow victim of racism I feel your pain....


Like I've said before we need a sticky or seperate forum on counter-racist strategies dealing with everyday activities in the system of racism/white supremacy!

 

[Ill Paragraph]

Peace,

Seriously, Sis. Bang out an abbreviated version real quick.

 

[Camille]

http://blavity.com/black-bodies-need-love-too-7-resources-for-self-care/



Black bodies need love too: 7 resources for self-care

Our churches are burning. We are being murdered in mass.

We are forced to bury our sons. The names of our sisters are going unspoken, forgotten.

Black culture is appropriated. Black bodies are demonized and destructed.

The confederate flag is seen as heritage over hate. This country was built on our backs, a system always designed to keep us out.

We face police brutality, school push outs, gentrification, mass incarceration and death.

And yet, we must survive. Our lives matter and sometimes in the midst of it all, in the world telling us otherwise over and over and over, it’s hard to remember that. Absorbed in the movement, the anger, the fear, the sadness and the overwhelming sense of something so heavy that it cannot be named, it can be hard to remember that we must take care of our minds and our bodies.

We must be the first to treat ourselves and our fellow black folks like gold. We must nurture our #BlackMagic.

Don’t get me wrong, this is not easy and this list might not make it any easier, but nonetheless here are a few things that could be of use.

1. Everything Is Awful and I’m Not Okay: questions to ask before giving up by Eponis @ Tumblr. Everyone read this, share this, save this, please. Hang it on your wall and look at it when things are just too tough.


2. Diamond J. Sharp runs an entire blog dedicated to the mental health of black girls, a population whose trauma, depression and hurt is disproportionately ignored as a result of a complex system of stigma sometimes referred to as “black superwoman syndrome.”





3. Here are 6 Steps You Can Take To Start Healing From Trauma Right Now.

4. In her article Subversive Self-Care: Centering Black Women’s Wellness, Shanesha Brooks-Tatum outlines five strategies for wellness. “Ultimately,” she writes, “to take care of ourselves is to treasure ourselves, and ensure that we’ll have the longevity to continue our activist work against racism, sexism, heterosexism, and other “-isms” that attempt to circumscribe and control bodies in this world.”

5. Not yet released but on my radar is The Black Body Survival Guide. Envisioned by Intelligent Mischief, the book is an artistic and much-needed response to systemic racism. With enough support, the guide will soon be published and distributed by Intelligent Mischief, Boston-based creatives who describe themselves as “a group of Afro-Caribbean sci-fi, afro-futurist, comedians, arts, dance and theater nerds running a civic engagement hack lab.”





6. 11 Black Queer and Trans Women Discuss Self-Care in this article. Whether they revive themselves through recharging alone, by immersing themselves in their creative processes or surrounding themselves with positive friends, each of these women has gotten in touch with the practices that serve them best.

7. And last but certainly, certainly not least — a reminder from the woman who says it best, Audre Lorde.

 

[Camille]

Can I get some cliff notes.

Peace,

Seriously, Sis. Bang out an abbreviated version real quick.

Sorry y'all. There really isn't a cliff notes...lol...
These are just self care resources I'm posting
related specifically to black folks and police brutality.
Looks like we might be in for a long summer.

 

[cocobeauty]

Great stuff @Camille. I definitely love the affirmations!

I've recently taken a break from Social media...for the very reasons mentioned above. It was absorbing me and I found myself HATING people or viewing them strange. And the few that's here that I'm cool with on FB know me and how I view things.

Funny thing was I was going to reactivate my account today...

I try to come here sometimes to just be able to not get caught up in the BS because I have the option to not open a thread.

 

[Dr. Truth]

I appreciate the post. I'll take some time to read.

 

[4 Dimensional]

Nobody said the truth was pleasant. Hence the matrix we live in. Everytime we have reminders about our place in this society we fall back into the matrix of delusion. The complexity of our everyday behaviors is something that many folks in this country do not understand. Hell, we can barely understand how we should feel about it. Usually grief, then followed by anger is how we respond. But how does one channel their anger when their voice is so small in the matter?

Social media allows us to express, but is the expression really healthy? Many times people are caught in a battle of truths. Opinions they believe so wholeheartedly, that they are blind to certain realities. The emotion invoked in trying to maintain one's truth causes us to spiral in a way that may be mentally unhealthy. Social media while good is many ways, is mentally unhealthy, in my opinion. Well at least for those embrace the massiveness that social media has to offer. Once your opinion is give on any matter of truth, you will be challenged in one way or another.

It's like finding out Santa clause wasn't real.

 

[POSTERBOY]

My one golden rule for protecting myself is simple;

DON'T, BY ANY MEANS, FOLLOW CACS ON SOCIAL MEDIA!!!!!

 

[Mrfreddygoodbud]

man listen..

I dont think its getting worse, I think the same shit has always been going on,

but because of the internet and social media, we can keep track of the bullshit savagery on a global basis....

whereas before everyone was pretty much restricted to their regional news stories..

but truth is... at the end of the day are YOU doing whats best for you...

making the right choices... thinkin the right thoughts, eating the right foods, and drinking the right drinks...

makes no sense worrying about police brutality and pink supremacy if you dying from heart disease and diabetes...

or stressing yourself out so much you need therapy...

the real war is the war within..

make sure you winning that one first!!!

 

[Mrfreddygoodbud]

My one golden rule for protecting myself is simple;

DON'T, BY ANY MEANS, FOLLOW CACS ON SOCIAL MEDIA!!!!!

lol I be tearing those racist pink toes up, having them rethink their existence...

 

[Camille]

https://theawkwardactivist.wordpress.com/2016/06/08/self-care-as-an-activist/ edited for some content.

Self Care as an Activist


As an activist or “social justice warrior” which is what activist are now commonly referred to on social media, is a person who campaigns for some kind of change. For example, participating in a march or protest, you’re an activist. I am an activist. I know this, as a matter of fact I named my blog The Awkward Activist for this exact purpose. Each activist has a certain social issue they focus on when campaigning for change, for example, I focus on race, gender, and sexuality. But when blogging and talking about these issues, especially when talking about issues you personally identify with, it becomes emotionally and mentally draining.

Reading every new headline or news report from a news outlet or tweets from my fellow followers on Twitter alerting me to another police brutality case or an increase in sexual assault on college campuses, can sometimes be too much to take or handle. Each day is another punch in the stomach for every new headline that comes across my mobile screen as most news nowadays is bad news. We are in the digital era where we can see and read every story, good and bad. And while many will say that it is an activist own fault that they have gotten themselves into this situation, the reason activists do the work they do is simple, it is because they care. I care about writing, educating people, and protesting these issues because I want the issues that I am writing and passionate about to get better or disappear all together (I don’t see that happening anytime soon though).

But when you’re an activist everyone’s struggles are more important than your own, but who is there for you when you’re struggling?

As an activist one of the most important things is practicing self-care as this constant absorbing of information, especially bad news from police brutality to rape culture can lead to an activist not only becoming burn out, but also, depressed. Burn out is a state of emotional and often physical exhaustion (newtactics). It is not a matter of spending too much time on a task or issues, but rather that an activist feels as though they have invested a significant amount of time and emotion into a task regarding a certain issue, but no results have stemmed from that task. They feel they have nothing to show for all of the work they have put in. Activist burn out is real and caring for yourself as an activist is not selfish, but is self-preserving as you can not help or serve others if you yourself are also struggling mentally and emotionally.

What is self-care exactly and how does one go about practicing self care, especially as an activist? Self-care includes any intentional actions you take to care for your physical, mental, and emotional health. Self-care is unique to each individual person as that person has to find what works best for them, but self-care is extremely beneficial to activists. As activists our activism is our self-care; discussing and talking about the issues we feel most strongly about helps us care for ourselves as we are then not keeping these emotions in, but we also find support systems and networks through our activism. We find people who we can not only discuss these issues with on an almost daily basis, but also people who we can discuss how these issues are affecting our emotions and feelings.

Activists also need to remember that our feelings are valid. Good, bad, or in between all the feelings we feel are valid and real. Meaning just because you feel angry or sad about something does not mean those feelings are irrelevant just because a person may advocate for the issue that they are emotionally reacting to. Their emotions are still valid.

A few self-care tips is first figuring out and doing what makes you happy. If that is painting or drawing, working out, taking a walk around the neighborhood, or even just pampering yourself by doing your nails or soaking in a bathtub with a bath bomb in it, it is all self-care. Self-care should and needs to work best for each individual person, there is no linear or general way of self-care so do not feel pressured to do what may work for someone else. As an activist, but also a regular person who experiences and is affected by life happening on a daily basis I encourage everyone to start practicing self-care in their daily routine.

 

[4 Dimensional]

Great stuff @Camille. I definitely love the affirmations!

I've recently taken a break from Social media...for the very reasons mentioned above. It was absorbing me and I found myself HATING people or viewing them strange. And the few that's here that I'm cool with on FB know me and how I view things.

Funny thing was I was going to reactivate my account today...

I try to come here sometimes to just be able to not get caught up in the BS because I have the option to not open a thread.

social media are the thoughts that people have that they dare not say face to face to a person. Think about that. Social media is the thoughts of people.

In physical reality you don't know what a person is thinking, but social media allows that to happen. Are we really prepared for that type of reality? Many of us aren't.

 

[Camille]

My one golden rule for protecting myself is simple;

DON'T, BY ANY MEANS, FOLLOW CACS ON SOCIAL MEDIA!!!!!

LOL. I follow quite a few really cool white people on twitter. Many are also passionate about social justice issues, including black lives matter. I do proactively block tho. Most of the people I've had to block are conservatives and the blue lives matter people. I don't hate cops on principle. I have family and old friends who are officers, my ex boy friend is an officer, but there are definitely bad apples in the bunch, and they make my loved ones less safe if the public feels their lives are at stake behind a casual shopping trip or traffic violation.

 

[cocobeauty]

social media are the thoughts that people have that they dare not say face to face to a person. Think about that. Social media is the thoughts of people.

In physical reality you don't know what a person is thinking, but social media allows that to happen. Are we really prepared for that type of reality? Many of us aren't.

I don't think we really are....prepared that is.

 

[princeprince]

Get a fucking education.

 

[Camille]

Self-Care for #BlackLivesMatter Activists!
Recently having written a piece on mental health and mindfulness for Black men “A New Way to Manage Stress” -HealthyBlackMen.Org, I wanted to also reach out an overlapping community, that means a great deal to me.

As the ‪#BlackLivesMatter‪ movement gains momentum, it is important that everyone who is putting themselves on the line do their best to take care of themselves. The movement is about justice, however I do not see the need for the selflessness of activist to become acts of martyrdom. My hope is that everyone will be able to see the promise land, which means that activists need to pay attention, not only to their safety out in the streets, but also to our physical and mental well-being as a whole.

Specifically, lets look at a prerequisite of activism. People take action when they are motivated by emotion. And when we talk about promoting social change from the position of the oppressed, then the emotion that we are usually speaking of is anger. This anger can be experienced as guilt, shame, sadness, pain, confusion, or tension. It can push us towards anxiety or depression, reduce our ability to control our reactions, and even cause us to spin out of control.

That said, anger also motivates movement. It can push us to act in ways that inspire individuals to put righteousness before self-interest. Anger can be a powerful tool for any activist, yet like any tool, one must be deft in one’s ability to wield anger, or risks being cut down by one’s own initiative. Therefore we must acknowledge the need for anger, but not let it degrade our mental and physical health. In order to find this balance, we must learn to be mindful.

Anger can be described as an emotional reaction to our perception of the world around us. We become angry when we believe that a transgression should not have happened, or that something proper was prevented from happening (Averill, 1983). The only real way to rid our selves of anger is to change the reality that is inspiring the anger, or to change the way that you see and understand that reality.

As an activist, the act of becoming conscious removes the option to pretend that injustice is not present. It disallows the closing of one’s eyes to oppression, which leaves us with only the choice of inaction and the likelihood that our constructive anger will turn unto itself and become a destructive bitterness. Alternately, we can work to change our reality. For social justice advocates this means that we must endeavor to change systems and institutions in order to promote a more socially just environment.

Yet as we engage in the struggle against oppression, we are likely to find ourselves in the bind of living with perpetual ‪anger based on the reality that we cannot change the world all at once. In fact the very nature of the the struggle is that it is an ongoing movement, not a finite moment. And that the people who take on the responsibility of activism must be ready to weather this emotional storm, while remaining connected to their fellow activist, communities, and allies.

Gorski (2015) explained that he found that activists are susceptible to burnout, yet are able to remain effective through attention to self-care. With this in mind, I propose that activists must be tenacious in their dedication to self-care and supporting their folks. We must understand that just as Black Lives Matter is an inclusive affirmation of the fundamental value of Black lives, it also must be adhered to in the nurturing and protection of the health and well-being of our own Black bodies.

Here are some tips for ‪self care in activism:

1. Maintain you relationships with family and friends. Social support is Key.
2. Work off tension, anger, & depression with exercise. It also helps to keep your mind focused on the present.
3. Celebrate your victories! Keep a list of the things that make you proud to be you.
4. Practice ‪mindfulness. Take time to meditate, breath, stretch, and just be still (Gorski, 2015).
5. Talk to an affirming Counselor or Therapist. Working through ‪trauma is hard to do alone.

References

Averill, J. R. (1983). Studies on anger and aggression: Implications for theories of emotion. American Psychologist, 38(11), 1145–1160. doi:10.1037/0003–066X.38.11.1145

Gorski, P. C. (2015). Relieving burnout and the ‘martyr syndrome’ among social justice education activists: The implications and effects of mindfulness. The Urban Review, doi:10.1007/s11256–015–0330–0

Copyright 2015 Bedford E. F. Palmer II, Ph. D.

Visit my website for more information: www.drbfpalmer.com

Follow me on twitter @drbfpalmer

 

[4 Dimensional]

I don't think we really are....prepared that is.

So, how do we prepare?

My solution is PROPER education, but it's hard to do that when there are cute cat videos or something you shopped on Amazon for right next to a killing of one of us by a police officer. Too many distractions for us to stay focused.

 

[Better]

Mmmmm, Camille. I've read your posts from afar for years. I consider myself adept at reading between lines, and between the lines I have been able to discern that your unwashed ass probably smells like a yellow jasmine.

 

[POSTERBOY]

LOL. I follow quite a few really cool white people on twitter. Many are also passionate about social justice issues, including black lives matter. I do proactively block tho. Most of the people I've had to block are conservatives and the blue lives matter people. I don't hate cops on principle. I have family and old friends who are officers, my ex boy friend is an officer, but there are definitely bad apples in the bunch, and they make my loved ones less safe if the public feels their lives are at stake behind a casual shopping trip or traffic violation.

If I don't know them personally, chances are I'm not following them. I also follow a couple white people that I've come across and have deemed to not be CACs, but they're few and far in between.

I feel you on the blue lives matter stuff. I mostly run into that problem on FB, thank God I rarely check it. I'll log in and see my uncle (a cop) or 1 or 2 cats I went to high school with pushing that blue lives matter BS and I just want to ask them why they can't separate being a cop from the situation and just see what the hell... ugh I don't even want to get started

 

[Camille]

http://www.langleyharper.com/we-must-rebuild-black-lives-matter/

We Must Rebuild: Black Lives Matter. Your Life Matters

It feels like only yesterday that I spoke with David Person on WEUP-94.5 FM/1700 AM in Huntsville, Ala., calling for self-care in an endless cycle of destruction on the Black psyche. We were in the midst of the Baltimore riots.


I grew up hearing about four little girls who lost their lives in 1963 while in Sunday school in Birmingham, Ala. Their memories and faces radiate through my mind right now.


And now, nine lives were lost in Charleston, South Carolina. In a house of worship. For many, this is where our souls come to rest and recharge. Where do they rest now?


Each day, I tell youth who are fighting on the front lines to find a space for themselves to repair and heal. This fight is exhausting, and will burn you out repeatedly. I see a long fight ahead, and want them to be prepared. We can’t afford to lose them.


And yet, each morning, when blacks leave their homes–child, adult, male, or female–their families seemingly take a greater than average risk that they may be lost. Videos from the pool incident in McKinney, Texas reinforce that not even our youth are safe.


Who do we trust? Our trust and our hearts are broken.


We must rebuild

Each time we turn on the news or go on social media and receive confirmation that our lives are not valued by society, we must rebuild.


Each time we are surrounded by co-workers, peers, or friends and realize that they do not see what is happening to black lives everywhere, we must rebuild.


We must rebuild by connecting to each other. By picking up the shattered broken pieces of our trust and hope and slowly fusing them back together. By believing that we are still worthy, that we are worth fighting for. Poor, rich, accomplished, struggling, strong, or beaten by the storm–we each still matter.


Your life matters

You are what this world needs to move forward. We can’t move forward without you. We depend on your healing and your continued engagement.


There is a constant debate as to whether the plight of our race is worsening each day. What is beyond debate is the feeling that the next assault on our psyche and worth is only hours or days away. When we feel a moment of peace in our personal lives, it is clouded by the certainty that someone else is faring worse in this unfair society. We close our eyes and breathe, because the peace we feel is fleeting.


Breathe. You must breathe

Below, I have provided a few tips to help you rebuild yourself and repair what is broken so that you may carry on in your work, in your family, and in your life.


1) Talk to someone you trust
Find a therapist to work through what you are experiencing right now. Look into behavioral health coverage through your medical plan or the Employee Assistance Program (EAP) offered through your employer. If you do not have mental health benefits, there are therapists who work on a sliding scale. The Association of Black Psychologists has a directory of black psychologists available nationwide.


Our community is still fighting stigma around mental health. These resources exist not because you are flawed or weak, but because you are proactive and want to protect your health.


Reach out to your faith or spiritual community. Talk to a loved one whom you can trust. Just having someone to talk to for a few minutes can be helpful in processing your experience.


2) Monitor your intake of news and/or social media
There was a time where I checked CNN, Huffington Post, and Facebook daily. I no longer do. I found that the constant shock of bad news overwhelmed me. If you are feeling sensitive, raw, or over-exposed, take note. It is your responsibility to protect yourself. Seek information in a way that allows you some sense of control over how it flows into your life. Know that even without watching television or going on the internet, news of upsetting events will have a way of finding you. Decide how you will take care of yourself in those moments.


3) Exhale
It is impossible to live in this world as a black man or woman without these events affecting you. They literally threaten our hope, our vitality, our belief in the power of good to overcome evil. Whether you journal, run, meditate, pray, or scream, find a way to exhale. We must not keep the anger, the frustration, the confusion, the bitterness, or the sadness inside. We will explode.


4) Choose your battles
When I see people who ignore what is going on around us, who minimize–or worse, mock–the importance of each event, a part of me wants to correct them. I want them to borrow my shoes and see life from my perspective. However, I have learned that I must pick my battles. Again, this is a lifelong battle, and I can’t afford to be worn out by anger and bitterness. I have to let go. Sometimes, I reassure myself with the idea that I have planted a seed, and perhaps it will be reaped days, months, or years, later. Other times, I feel frustrated that they will never get it.


Still, I must live, breathe, and move forward. I find that my goal is to speak my truth, stay true to my convictions, and allow them to be responsible for their response.


In closing, I challenge you to take a moment to reflect on your feelings in the aftermath of what has taken place in Charleston, South Carolina. Take a breath, and take note of what is broken. Ask yourself what you must do to rebuild. Dedicate yourself to self-care. It is a practice that you must cultivate to preserve yourself in this battle.

What are you doing to rebuild?

 

[Camille]

Mmmmm, Camille. I've read your posts from afar for years. I consider myself adept at reading between lines, and between the lines I have been able to discern that your unwashed ass probably smells like a yellow jasmine.

I am at a complete and total loss as to how to respond to this.

 

[Camille]

There is a self care intro I skipped over, but it's one of the links below. You kind of have to delve into the individual links. Not specific to BLM but good info...

http://socialwork.buffalo.edu/resources/self-care-starter-kit/developing-your-self-care-plan.html


Developing Your Self-Care Plan
To develop your self-care plan, you will identify what you value and need as part of your day-to-day life (maintenance self-care) and the strategies you can employ when or if you face a crisis along the way (emergency self-care).

There is no “one-size-fits-all” self-care plan, but there is a common thread to all self-care plans: making a commitment to attend to all the domains of your life, including your physical and psychological health, emotional and spiritual needs, and relationships.




Introduction to Self-Care
An introduction to self-care, its aims, and available resources

Think of your self-care plan as a roadmap -- with planned vehicle maintenance, travel activities and rest stops along the way.



Steps to guide you...
Don't be overwhelmed by the steps in this process! They are simple and straightforward and will help to guide you on your path.


1. How do you cope now?
Identify what you do now to manage the stress in your life. The Lifestyle Behaviors(86 KB) (pdf) (“Is your life causing you stress?”) assessment can help you to identify the coping strategies you currently use and whether they are likely to be good (or not so good) for your well-being.

Decreasing or eliminating at least one “negative” coping strategy can be one of the goals of your maintenance self-care; employing more "positive" strategies can be another.

2. What do you do for self-care now?
The Self-Care Assessment(46 KB) (pdf) will help you highlight the good things you are already doing for yourself and whether there is an imbalance in the areas in which you practice self-care.

The items in this assessment can also give you some ideas for additional things you may want to do in the future to help prevent stress and burnout and to maintain and enhance your well-being. Make a note of the items that you would like to add (or add more of) to your self-care practice. In considering this, try to be sure that each domain of self-care is well represented. If you think of things that are not included in this list, just add them at the end.

3. Maintenance self-care: Adding self-care practices and eliminating obstacles
"Maintenance self-care" refers to the activities that you have identified as important to your well-being and that you have committed to engage in on a regular basis to take care of yourself.

My Maintenance Self-Care Worksheet(176 KB) (pdf) provides an opportunity for you to identify the activities you would like to add to your self-care practice in each self-care domain (“new practice”).

It is also useful to identify possible barriers or obstacles that could get in the way of implementing and/or maintaining these new activities. Think about what you anticipate these barriers/obstacles to be (try to list at least 3 or 4 in the spaces provided), how you can address them, and how you can remind yourself to follow your plan. Write these solutions on the last page of the My Maintenance Self-Care Worksheet(176 KB) (pdf). If you have chosen to limit or eliminate a negative coping strategy that you currently use, note this as well.

You can revisit this topic and revise your list as the demands of your personal and professional life change.

4. Emergency self-care: Be prepared
So far we have focused on maintenance self-care: the kinds of things one does regularly to reduce stress and maintain and enhance well-being. But planning out what you would do under extremely trying circumstances, even though they are rare, is also important. To do this, develop a framework using your Emergency Self-Care worksheet (pdf)(380 KB) before you are faced with a crisis or feel overwhelmed. This is not to suggest that you will invariably face such a situation; the idea is to be prepared just in case.

Think of developing your emergency self-care plan in the way you would think about preparing for other possible emergency situations: it is important to figure out your plan in advance when you have the time, wherewithal, and concentration to do so effectively!

5. Make a commitment to yourself

Remember: Just like the flight attendant says, you need to put on your own oxygen mask first before you can be of help to others. So, take a moment, think it over, and then make your personal commitment to your own self-care. You deserve it!

If you find making a commitment to be a challenge, then take some time to explore your reservations. Do you have a tendency to put the needs of others first? The truth is that your self-care is not only essential to your well-being, but it is also a necessary element for you to be effective and successful in honoring your professional and personal commitments.

Preparing a plan is important; it identifies your goals and the strategies to achieve them. However your success in implementing your plan is ultimately based on the level of commitment you make to your self-care.

6. Share your plan
Once you have developed your plan and made your commitment, remember that friends, family, peers, and/or colleagues may be good additional resources for exchanging new self-care ideas/strategies and to provide support and encouragement.

Consider taking your commitment a step further by joining or starting a support or discussion group (see Tips for Starting a Support or Discussion Group(91 KB)).

7. Follow your plan
Now that you have completed the assessments and worksheets described above, you have identified the core elements of your personal Self-Care Plan. The final step is to implement your plan and keep track of how you are doing. Keeping track of your progress will help you recognize your successes and identify and address any difficulties you may not have anticipated. Don’t forget that you can revise your plan as needed. Remember, also, to employ your emergency plan should emotionally difficult circumstances arise.

Remember that self-care is always a work in progress!

 

[Chitownheadbusa]

Correct me if im wrong....but is this stuff for people who let what they see in the media or what other people say stress them out??

 

[Camille]

http://www.selfcarebyaisha.com/2015/03/10/self-care-lessons-from-civil-rights-leaders-in-selma/

Self-care lessons from the civil rights leaders in Selma

For the past couple of day, I’ve been following the coverage of the 50th Anniversary of Bloody Sunday in Selma, Alabama. No matter what I’m doing these days, I see everything through a self-care lens. If you know the story of the historic civil rights actions that took place in Selma, Alabama 50 years ago, you know that the protesters in Selma sacrificed their psychological and physical well-being all in name of equality. They endured, together. But that endurance isn’t magical. They took care of each other.

While watching the movie Selma, when they get to Selma they arrive at house full of laughter, good times, and most importantly good food. Then later on that night Martin Luther King Jr. can’t sleep and he picks up the phone to have Mahalia Jackson sing, “Precious Lord.”

Precious Lord, take my hand


Lead me on, let me stand


I’m tired, I’m weak, I’m lone


Through the storm, through the night


Lead me on to the light


Take my hand precious Lord, lead me home

It resonated with me. They built a system of support so they could endure.


That’s self-care. That’s a pillar of strong leadership.

I was struck again when the ever so eloquent Jay Smooth gave his thoughts on the anniversary of the march.

“When you commit some part of your life to activism…you’re basically committing to a lifetime of work that might, if you’re lucky, contain a few fleeting moments of triumph.”

It’s hard work. Just like those that came before us psychological and physical warfare are the tactics used to break us down. We have jobs and families we have to balance while we continue to fight for justice and equality. It’s no easy feat. But we each one of us has to figure out how we are going to get it done. It’s a skill.

Whenever we talk about leadership skills, self-care is always missing. If my generation and the #blacklivesmatter generation are going endure we have to build that foundation of self-care that is going to keep us going. So as thousands commemorate Bloody Sunday, remember how those that came before us cared for themselves to be able to endure to see civil rights legislation passed that we all benefit from today.

 

[Camille]

Correct me if im wrong....but is this stuff for people who let what they see in the media or what other people say stress them out??

And/or for people who have seen black people slaughtered one after the other, with no justice in sight, can't watch one more video without screaming, and need to remember to take time for themselves during high stress times when you can't get away from the discussion on top of all the other daily annoyances and racial stress we have to deal with, yes.

(How's that for a run on sentence?)

 

[The Plutonian]

This is real MF long but very necessary . Subbed. Yea and put down the damn cellphone sometimes. Let that bitch ring

 

[durham]

Feel sad, feel something...get the fuck up and grab your power. Fuck a therapist and or any plan that does not start with self determination and group organization. Use your mind, body and a few guns. Save your money, spend with your own, properly arm yourself and your children and be willing to fight NOT pray when it the conflict comes to your door. If you do pray, pray that your family loves you enough to wake up and do the same, if death comes to you, too soon.

America has shown us what it is about, decade, after decade. Why in the hell do we insist on waiting for a civil solution to a never ending extinction level event on our people.

 

[Mo-Better]

You know today we get bombarded with information every hour of the day. From TV news, radio, magazines, social media on our computers, tablets and phones this level of information will raise anyone's level of anxiety to a point where you feel the need to tune out. It get to a point where it becomes overwhelming.

People ask me how I exist without being active on social media groups and I tell them I just don't see the need. Just look at what comes across BGOL alone daily. I know BGOL isn't really a social media site but you can't ignore the volume of media and other information that's posted here.

Between following friends, family, your favorite teams, players, what ills we face daily (like Baton Rouge yesterday) you can and will suffer burnout. So I pick and choose what I give attention to and how much. Its difficult but I feel its necessary at least for me.

The film footage I saw yesterday in Baton Rouge where those murdering cops killed this brother selling bootleg CDs was sickening. But when you look at what passes today as our congress, those vying to become our next president, you can see why racist whites in law enforcement feel they can act without fear.

Just look at the brother whose spine was severed by the police. Then a clear cut violation of how he was transported yet not one cop has yet been found guilty. This stuff keeps you under pressure. How can you live a relaxed lifestyle with what's happening to our people almost daily? No I'm going to say daily because there's a lot going on we never hear about.

The stress of is stuff wears on you. Wonder why your your hair is turning grey, blood pressure is high? Can't sleep, gaining weight? All this crap takes its toll upon you.

 

[Camille]

 

[RoadRage]

Let your emotion spark your thinking, but when you think it should be emotionless, then and if you choose to react you all your emotion to inspire you, but never lose control of you thought and plan...
Overly emotional people are weak and are prone to making silly mistakes...

 

[Camille]

Self-Care Practice For Black People To Cope With Trauma

Trauma in the black community is a constant reality we have to face.

We especially feel it when an unarmed black man is killed by a cop, a black womandies in police custody or an officer walks free of charges after killing a black child in the park. In America, our skin color is a daily reminder that we, and our loved ones, may not make it to tomorrow.

One of the most recent reminders of this seemingly unescapable fate is Alton Sterling, who was shot several times in the chest and back by Baton Rouge police Tuesday outside of a convenience store where he frequently sold CDs. Before the black community could even fully process Sterling’s death, Philando Castile was gunned down Wednesday after he was pulled over for a busted tail light. Accompanying both tragedies were gruesome videos and images of cops taking their lives ― including Sterling’s bloody corpse plastered on Wednesday’s New York Daily News’ front page cover.

Sterling and Castile’s killings weren’t isolated incidents. Black bodies have been at risk long before smartphones were readily available for people to document police brutality. We now live in a country where we’re inundated with horrific news and images that remind us why we have to declare to the world that #BlackLivesMatter.

These graphic images of slain black lives can be triggering if we neglect our mental and emotional limits. This is why black people must take the extra steps to preserve their health, especially in a digital space.



The unfortunate reality is that Sterling and Castile weren’t the first and they won’t be the last to lose their lives to police shootings. But while we fight for them and stand against the despicable cycle of black death at the hands of cops leading to non-indictment, we must take care of ourselves.


Here are five ways you can practice good mental and emotional habits online while coping with race-related trauma.


1. Turn video autoplay off on your social media pages.


You DO NOT have to watch the videos of these killings to stay informed. The autoplay setting on many platforms like Facebook and Twitter make this unavoidable, especially when the videos are shared over and over again on your timeline. Luckily, you can control whether or not you want these videos to automatically play.




2. Follow accounts that inform and nurture you without force feeding you torturous details.


The quickest way to send yourself into an anxious frenzy is looking at a string of triggering posts on your timeline. Make an effort to weed out the accounts who capitalize on black death by posting purposefully “baity” content for the sake of a share or like. Make a list of some of your favorite accounts that inform you in a realistic, productive and ethical manner.


3. Ignore the trolls.


Trolls deserve zero attention. This rings especially true when they use black pain and death to taunt people who speak out against racism. Instead of stressing yourself over irrelevant trolls, realize that they went out of their way to search for your post ― most likely behind a fake account ― and expose their bigotry. It’s usually a fruitless endeavor to explain how racism works to a Twitter account with an egg as an avatar so do yourself a favor and use that block button.


4. Log off.

You shouldn’t feel guilty for unplugging for a few hours ― or days. Sometimes that is the best thing you can do for yourself in the midst of trauma. When you’re inundated with news updates, often times of a disturbing nature, staying informed can seem too heavy duty so You have to balance the bad with the good. Take a walk, write in a journal, watch a movie or do anything productive that makes you happy. You can get lost in the digital madness if you don’t walk away every now and then. Don’t worry, everything will still be there when you get back.


5. Remember offline conversations are just as important as online conversations.


Confide in friends and family about how you’re feeling. Vent. Write it down. Talk to yourself. However you communicate your feelings, remember that it doesn’t have to always be online. It’s vital to have people in your life whose shoulder you can cry on and can help you process traumatic events. It’s equally as important to have people who can uplift you and help reaffirm why your livelihood matters. A good support system is key.


These are just a few tips that may help you remain hopeful. Maintaining your overall health is the only way you can continue to fight the good fight and help make a difference. And always remember, in the words of Kendrick Lamar, “we gon’ be alright.”


http://blacktolive.org/news/health/self-care-practice-for-black-people-to-cope-with-trauma/