Black Men & Stress: Have you ever had a horrible run of BAD LUCK & How did u deal?

[A to Dah K]

 

[spider705]

The end of the year is less than 90 days away, and the last thing you want is to deplete your emergency fund. As a board member, the least I can do is contribute something to help you out. It may not be much, but it can cover some of your smaller bills and help you avoid dipping into your savings. I’m not very liquid right now, but I do have some funds I can donate. Life gets tough, especially as you enter the fourth quarter and realize you have more sunsets behind you than ahead. Shoot me your Bitcoin or Ethereum address, and I’ll send a donation.

I know a lot of people don’t like Tommy Jakes, but he had a sermon back in 2011 called “Fightback.” I can’t find the entire sermon, but this is a snippet towards the end, at the 7:15 mark, where he talks about the goldfish—it really hit home for me. I listened to that sermon 13 years ago. I doubt if you will be able to find it today cause most of the YouTube videos have been taken down, but I do have a copy of that sermon.

Bishop TD Jakes Fight Back Praise

This is from one of TD Jakes greatest sermon series, Fight For The Family. Please call 1-800-BISHOP2 to order this series for yourself. It is awesome. Men of God praising God and fighting to get...

www.godtube.com

My brother i cannot thank you enough. I found a sermon of his that was essentially titled FIGHT BACK on YouTube... I don't think it was this one but I still listened to it... it definitely helped to set a tone for today and for the man I want to become on the other side of this storm.

I've deleted our deactivated most of my social media. I found myself just doing the "death scroll" too long and not really focusing on what I need to do to get back right. I did 10 minutes of guided meditation this morning, plan on hitting 10k steps on my galaxy watch fitness tracker, and I'll read 10 pages tonight of this leadership book that's been collecting dust on my shelf. I'm also fasting today, and praying as necessary to keep me focused.

I hope this is a good start and I'm going to take it one day at a time, and continue to do this exact process everyday. Only thing I'm adding on is weight training, which I'll start tomorrow morning.

It's time I take it back to what I was and who i was around this time 2 years ago.

 

[CORNBREAD]

 

[A to Dah K]

Book gave a good deeper insight on his life before becoming a public figure

 

[phanatic]

Not bad luck at the moment, but I'm ready to call it. I'm just so overwhelmed. I want a break from everything, and there seems to be only one way to get it. No one is returning my texts, no one is returning my calls. I'm so tired. Thanks for all the laughs and real ass discussion. Be strong black men, always and everyday.

 

[BlackGoku]

My brother i cannot thank you enough. I found a sermon of his that was essentially titled FIGHT BACK on YouTube... I don't think it was this one but I still listened to it... it definitely helped to set a tone for today and for the man I want to become on the other side of this storm.

I've deleted our deactivated most of my social media. I found myself just doing the "death scroll" too long and not really focusing on what I need to do to get back right. I did 10 minutes of guided meditation this morning, plan on hitting 10k steps on my galaxy watch fitness tracker, and I'll read 10 pages tonight of this leadership book that's been collecting dust on my shelf. I'm also fasting today, and praying as necessary to keep me focused.

I hope this is a good start and I'm going to take it one day at a time, and continue to do this exact process everyday. Only thing I'm adding on is weight training, which I'll start tomorrow morning.

It's time I take it back to what I was and who i was around this time 2 years ago.

Thats great fam! If you need extra motivation..Can't hurt me is a good book to get you fired up by David Goggins. This brotha went through hell and was determined not to be a statistic. Good luck on the journey!

 

[BlackGoku]

Not bad luck at the moment, but I'm ready to call it. I'm just so overwhelmed. I want a break from everything, and there seems to be only one way to get it. No one is returning my texts, no one is returning my calls. I'm so tired. Thanks for all the laughs and real ass discussion. Be strong black men, always and everyday.

Keep ya head up bruh. There are people counting on you. There's always another way!

 

[RoomService]

My brother i cannot thank you enough. I found a sermon of his that was essentially titled FIGHT BACK on YouTube... I don't think it was this one but I still listened to it... it definitely helped to set a tone for today and for the man I want to become on the other side of this storm.

I've deleted our deactivated most of my social media. I found myself just doing the "death scroll" too long and not really focusing on what I need to do to get back right. I did 10 minutes of guided meditation this morning, plan on hitting 10k steps on my galaxy watch fitness tracker, and I'll read 10 pages tonight of this leadership book that's been collecting dust on my shelf. I'm also fasting today, and praying as necessary to keep me focused.

I hope this is a good start and I'm going to take it one day at a time, and continue to do this exact process everyday. Only thing I'm adding on is weight training, which I'll start tomorrow morning.

It's time I take it back to what I was and who i was around this time 2 years ago.

This is the first part of the sermon. I haven’t been able to find the second half online, but the full sermon is 2 hours and 1 minute long. I actually have the entire sermon if you’re really interested in seeing it. In my opinion, it’s definitely one of his top three sermons of all time—and I’ve seen hundreds of them.

 

[keone]

Not bad luck at the moment, but I'm ready to call it. I'm just so overwhelmed. I want a break from everything, and there seems to be only one way to get it. No one is returning my texts, no one is returning my calls. I'm so tired. Thanks for all the laughs and real ass discussion. Be strong black men, always and everyday.

stay strong bro
this will make u stronger and maybe in the future u can help someone else out
going through the same shit

 

[CORNBREAD]

Book gave a good deeper insight on his life before becoming a public figure

I just ordered the book. I paid for his first one and we spoke briefly.. and he gave me five copies .. Definitely a real one

 

[A to Dah K]

I just ordered the book. I paid for his first one and we spoke briefly.. and he gave me five copies .. Definitely a real one

I just ordered the book. I paid for his first one and we spoke briefly.. and he gave me five copies .. Definitely a real one

First one?

 

[CORNBREAD]

First one?

 

[bxclark]

Things got worse, bruh... the devil was busy, let's just say that. I was seemingly attacked on every front that a man can be attacked on: family, love, financial.

It's going to be a long post. I got to get this shit off my chest.

Family
I had been working 2 jobs just to earn some extra money. Plus the chic was complaining about being in debt and I took it as a means for me to step up and help her out since I was in a good space. So my 2nd job i was getting off late at night, around 2am. Well one night I came in an hour or so early. My kids were here, and for some reason my daughter was acting weird. She kept coming out of her room, looking to see if I was asleep on the couch, asking questions, etc. This was strange for her because she's usually asleep by 11pm. So finally I go into my room at 3am to lay down for the night. Shortly after I hear my dog barking. I get up to see what his issue is and my daughter is at the front door. I'm like wtf are you doing, and she tells me she heard noises and wanted to look. I tell her that's my job, don't do that and go back to bed. She hugs me, goes back in her room. I am now curious about the noise so I check the ring camera and it's no noise but her letting her boyfriend out that she had snuck in while I was at work. I charge her up, tell her I'll talk to her in the morning about it. In the morning, she decides that the best way to deal with stress she has and getting caught is to attempt suicide. She takes about 30 500mg Tylenol and a few advil. Luckily I caught it, rushed her to the hospital, and after 2 nights there and multiple visits with a psychiatrist they released us. I'm glad to say she's fine now but to think that my last possible conversation with her could have been me yelling at her for having that boy in my home, it hurts. But we're good now and she's getting back to normal thank God.

Financial
A few days after this, we have a quality survey at work. I have a supervisor that is really good at her job, so I let her handle one section of the survey (which was typically her assigned duties) and I took care of everything else. I didn't check her work because she's usually on her game and hardly EVER slacks or makes mistakes. So imagine my surprise when we score low on the survey and it's in large part due to her section which failed miserably. The guy doing the survey assures us that it's normal to have a low score the first go round, but to make improvements he's notated and show progression when he comes back. We have a meeting with the customer to review the results and they're not too happy. My boss, the next day, calls and is going off, but I assure him I have a plan to get things right and lay out what I'm doing. Line for line, step for step I put it all out there. He calms down and is seemingly happy with my plan. He then says he needs my commitment to get this ship righted and I tell him I'm all in, 1000%. Shortly after, as I'm trying to provide progress updates he's no longer answering my emails, phone calls or texts. The following week i know he's coming to town and I'm expecting a written warning or unpaid suspension. Nope, he walks in and casually says with no remorse "I'm terminating you, effective immediately." So now I'm jobless and my daughter is now without insurance, which is bad because all of her therapy visits go thru my insurance. I don't put up much of a fight, I know that I'm just a casualty of war so to speak, and I walk out. Been unemployed since Sept. 3rd.

Relationship
So ole girl, she just is going about things as if i don't exist. She'll call or text every so often, but it's just small change conversations. About a week ago she called and was very apologetic, asking what she could do to help me with my job search and in any other way, and she also said she'd call or text more, do better with communication as she's now settled into her work schedule better. I tell her thank you and that more than anything she can just be there for me, as I'm pretty much a loner and don't have a strong support group around me. I didn't ask for money or anything, I just said please check on me, make sure I'm sane, I'm well, and I'm not being weighed down by all of these things going on all at once... because if I am I may do something stupid and, I don't want to think about that. She says she understands and that she'll do better. A week passes and she's not called one time and has only sent 5 text messages, each one being 3 words or less. At this point I'm taking this as a sign. Now I've given up on her and I'm not taking it well. We were supposed to get married. I still have the ring and all. I had planned out how I was going to propose, where I would do it, everything. Had to cancel all of that shit and now it's just me and my dog most days, unless my kids come over.

This all happened in 3 months, from July to September. I'm hurting to be honest, but I can't let that shit show to anyone. My bills are paid thru December, and I still have that little part time job so I pick up more shifts there and that gives me money to pay any bill that pops up unexpectedly... still, I look back on this last year and how fast and how far I've fallen, it's a wonder I haven't attempted to hurt myself. Now, I just stay to myself. I don't talk to anyone because I don't trust people after this. I rarely return text messages or phone calls, and I can't really afford to go places or do anything. It got so bad my sister had the police do a wellness check because I didn't return her calls. I cry way more than normal, and it's so random that I will have to stop everything or go into my room away from my kids when it starts.

I don't think I've ever been this broken in my life. And I have no clue how to fix it.

I saw a quote recently that I will share with you, brother.

"I've never seen anyone fail, who didn't quit."

Put your head down, focus on getting out of this situation, and don't give up. Suffering in silence is not going to help you either. Even if it's letting your thoughts or emotions out on here, it will help relieve some of the built up pressure and stress this situation is subjecting you to, so thanks again for sharing.

I've shared my story in the past and believe me, I can relate to what you are going through and how you're feeling. You have to stay diligent and positive my brother. Like I said previously... this too shall pass. You will be on the other side of this at some point.

Keep us posted so that we can celebrate with you when you are. I know we're all virtual acquaintances on here and strangers in real life, but if you are even around the DMV area, PM me and we can link up for a meal.

You got this, brother. Try to remain positive. It will work out.

 

[TRUFICTION]

Things got worse, bruh... the devil was busy, let's just say that. I was seemingly attacked on every front that a man can be attacked on: family, love, financial.

It's going to be a long post. I got to get this shit off my chest.

Family
I had been working 2 jobs just to earn some extra money. Plus the chic was complaining about being in debt and I took it as a means for me to step up and help her out since I was in a good space. So my 2nd job i was getting off late at night, around 2am. Well one night I came in an hour or so early. My kids were here, and for some reason my daughter was acting weird. She kept coming out of her room, looking to see if I was asleep on the couch, asking questions, etc. This was strange for her because she's usually asleep by 11pm. So finally I go into my room at 3am to lay down for the night. Shortly after I hear my dog barking. I get up to see what his issue is and my daughter is at the front door. I'm like wtf are you doing, and she tells me she heard noises and wanted to look. I tell her that's my job, don't do that and go back to bed. She hugs me, goes back in her room. I am now curious about the noise so I check the ring camera and it's no noise but her letting her boyfriend out that she had snuck in while I was at work. I charge her up, tell her I'll talk to her in the morning about it. In the morning, she decides that the best way to deal with stress she has and getting caught is to attempt suicide. She takes about 30 500mg Tylenol and a few advil. Luckily I caught it, rushed her to the hospital, and after 2 nights there and multiple visits with a psychiatrist they released us. I'm glad to say she's fine now but to think that my last possible conversation with her could have been me yelling at her for having that boy in my home, it hurts. But we're good now and she's getting back to normal thank God.

Financial
A few days after this, we have a quality survey at work. I have a supervisor that is really good at her job, so I let her handle one section of the survey (which was typically her assigned duties) and I took care of everything else. I didn't check her work because she's usually on her game and hardly EVER slacks or makes mistakes. So imagine my surprise when we score low on the survey and it's in large part due to her section which failed miserably. The guy doing the survey assures us that it's normal to have a low score the first go round, but to make improvements he's notated and show progression when he comes back. We have a meeting with the customer to review the results and they're not too happy. My boss, the next day, calls and is going off, but I assure him I have a plan to get things right and lay out what I'm doing. Line for line, step for step I put it all out there. He calms down and is seemingly happy with my plan. He then says he needs my commitment to get this ship righted and I tell him I'm all in, 1000%. Shortly after, as I'm trying to provide progress updates he's no longer answering my emails, phone calls or texts. The following week i know he's coming to town and I'm expecting a written warning or unpaid suspension. Nope, he walks in and casually says with no remorse "I'm terminating you, effective immediately." So now I'm jobless and my daughter is now without insurance, which is bad because all of her therapy visits go thru my insurance. I don't put up much of a fight, I know that I'm just a casualty of war so to speak, and I walk out. Been unemployed since Sept. 3rd.

Relationship
So ole girl, she just is going about things as if i don't exist. She'll call or text every so often, but it's just small change conversations. About a week ago she called and was very apologetic, asking what she could do to help me with my job search and in any other way, and she also said she'd call or text more, do better with communication as she's now settled into her work schedule better. I tell her thank you and that more than anything she can just be there for me, as I'm pretty much a loner and don't have a strong support group around me. I didn't ask for money or anything, I just said please check on me, make sure I'm sane, I'm well, and I'm not being weighed down by all of these things going on all at once... because if I am I may do something stupid and, I don't want to think about that. She says she understands and that she'll do better. A week passes and she's not called one time and has only sent 5 text messages, each one being 3 words or less. At this point I'm taking this as a sign. Now I've given up on her and I'm not taking it well. We were supposed to get married. I still have the ring and all. I had planned out how I was going to propose, where I would do it, everything. Had to cancel all of that shit and now it's just me and my dog most days, unless my kids come over.

This all happened in 3 months, from July to September. I'm hurting to be honest, but I can't let that shit show to anyone. My bills are paid thru December, and I still have that little part time job so I pick up more shifts there and that gives me money to pay any bill that pops up unexpectedly... still, I look back on this last year and how fast and how far I've fallen, it's a wonder I haven't attempted to hurt myself. Now, I just stay to myself. I don't talk to anyone because I don't trust people after this. I rarely return text messages or phone calls, and I can't really afford to go places or do anything. It got so bad my sister had the police do a wellness check because I didn't return her calls. I cry way more than normal, and it's so random that I will have to stop everything or go into my room away from my kids when it starts.

I don't think I've ever been this broken in my life. And I have no clue how to fix it.

After reading this ... I see only one thing. Cleansing.
This will probably sound crazy to you but.....
You are being removed from things that will not fit your future.
A purge is taking place in your life. Sometimes when we think things are bad
They are actually happening for a reason for our betterment and for what's next.
We don't know it till things change. Stuff seems bad when you look at it on the surface
But when you look deeper and them have the opportunity to look back
you will see they were necessary. Hang in there and weather the storm. It will get greater later.
The Brothers here will always be here to encourage you and lift you when You're down.
Stay the Course even though you may not be able to see over the hill...… YET !

 

[REDLINE]

After reading this ... I see only one thing. Cleansing.
This will probably sound crazy to you but.....
You are being removed from things that will not fit your future.
A purge is taking place in your life. Sometimes when we think things are bad
They are actually happening for a reason for our betterment and for what's next.
We don't know it till things change. Stuff seems bad when you look at it on the surface
But when you look deeper and them have the opportunity to look back
you will see they were necessary. Hang in there and weather the storm. It will get greater later.
The Brothers here will always be here to encourage you and lift you when You're down.
Stay the Course even though you may not be able to see over the hill...… YET !

I like this perspective and thought process.

 

[playahaitian]

I just ordered the book. I paid for his first one and we spoke briefly.. and he gave me five copies .. Definitely a real one

These are the positive stories we need to hear.

 

[playahaitian]

After reading this ... I see only one thing. Cleansing.
This will probably sound crazy to you but.....
You are being removed from things that will not fit your future.
A purge is taking place in your life. Sometimes when we think things are bad
They are actually happening for a reason for our betterment and for what's next.
We don't know it till things change. Stuff seems bad when you look at it on the surface
But when you look deeper and them have the opportunity to look back
you will see they were necessary. Hang in there and weather the storm. It will get greater later.
The Brothers here will always be here to encourage you and lift you when You're down.
Stay the Course even though you may not be able to see over the hill...… YET !

This is powerful

I think we should all discuss this method more because it is VERY heavy process that shouldn't be done lightly

 

[playahaitian]

Not bad luck at the moment, but I'm ready to call it. I'm just so overwhelmed. I want a break from everything, and there seems to be only one way to get it. No one is returning my texts, no one is returning my calls. I'm so tired. Thanks for all the laughs and real ass discussion. Be strong black men, always and everyday.

We here we listening